You save yourself
or you remain unsaved... School started again. I got the 4.0 I wanted last semester. I quit my job; my last day was January 27th. I'm in school full time now. It seems odd, ironic even, that after about 10 days unemployed, I feel busier now than I did before I quit. People seem to think I have a ton of free time on my hands but it's just worse; I'm trying to continue writing, do all my schoolwork, study, maintain that 4.0, and move forward with life, but it's just getting harder. Honestly, since I started Project 365, most of my updates are on Feisty Foodie. Especially the minor day-to-day ones... I need sleep. HAPPY XANGAVERSARY TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 8 years. Holy crap!!! Struggling with my life a bit right now and the strain on my time, but I will persevere. So that's all you get. Happy :) I started class this past Saturday. Yup! My schedule is going to be Saturdays 9am - 12pm, 12:05pm - 3pm Not too bad, I guess. (For any new readers - doubt I have any - I also work Monday-Friday, 9:30am - 5:30pm, so it's not like there's tons of free time around classes.) I will power through and finish this semester... keeping my 4.0 from last semester intact, I hope! Aim high, right? Right! See you in a month for my update... haha It's 2 am (my time, of course; why would I give the time of somewhere else?). The title of this post, "Why?" is the question that people ask time and again. Why? And there's rarely ever a very good, solid reason... especially when it's so damn emo to ask why, why so many things... Anyway, I'm trying not to be emo (or rather, not trying to be emo), and just wanted to blather a little bit into the ether. I haven't been doing that enough lately. Thoughts swirl in my head and I haven't been sharing them, and sometimes, that bothers me. Maybe that's why my head is hurting a little right now; too much bottled up within. In just under 2 months from now, I'll have been a Xanga member/user for 8 years. Xanga has seen me through a lot. It missed out - rather, I found Xanga a little less than a year after my father died. It would have been nice to have known Xanga through that time, but hell, it took me forEVER to deal with that (and, I could argue, I'm still dealing with that loss, so), and you can't go back in time and change things. Xanga saw me through that awful relationship I had at the time, too. Shit, Xanga's basically seen me go from that 20 year old girl to the 28 year old woman I am now. It sounds so silly but really, Xanga's the best friend I've ever had, because... Xanga listens no matter what, and Xanga NEVER wants to talk about itself. Xanga (which almost became the name of my dog, holla!) is just... I don't know. I've always kept journals and diaries growing up - I am a girl, and a verbose one at that, and a writer, all adding up to lots of journals throughout my lifetime - but Xanga. It's always been Xanga. Yeah, I've moved away from Xanga a bit in the past year, because of getting busy with things, and finding another spot to host my food blogs, but my personal blog has always been on Xanga, just so. I don't know, I didn't have a point really to this post, I just wanted to say... thanks for always being here, Xanga. Even in the beginning-ish, when you were starting to get really popular and your servers would go down and I would get so frustrated with you, you still rocked. I can't say I'm always happy with the updates and improvements that you've taken, but in the end, you're still Xanga, and that's what makes you awesome. Yea, these are the sorts of things I come up with at 2:07 in the morning... yawn. Oh, and before I go: let's go Mets!!!
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Name: Yvo
Birthday: 10/27/1980
Gender: Female
Interests: Food - photographing and consuming
Occupation: Professional Bitch
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Website: visit my website
Member Since:
9/30/2001
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I dreamed last night
I dreamed I was sitting in a Chinese restaurant with my father, watching a really old fashioned/homemade lotto machine flip the numbers. He smiled at me and told me to chant.
4! 4! 4! the numbers flipped. Everyone in the room seemed to get excited. I was excited. He was excited.
The numbers flipped and eventually, they were all down, most of them 4's, and we'd won.
Apparently no one else in the room had any 4's, so no one won but us. I didn't understand why they'd been so excited, then; I looked around, confused. Everyone had fallen deadly silent. My attention was drawn back to my father, who was clutching his ticket (I guess) and waving it excitedly. I asked,
"What did you win?"
and he told me 15.
15 thousand dollars?!
No, 15 dollars.
Now I was even more confused. All this for 15 dollars?
...
I woke up.
After giving it a lot of thought, I've attributed some meaning to certain events in the dream. 4 is a homonym of sorts in Cantonese to the word for 'death' - my father died this morning, 9 years ago, at about 4 am. I'm still confused where the 15 comes in. What did he win? 15 more minutes with us? 15 more minutes with me?
I don't know.
There was another part to my dream that I've forgotten. Maybe I'll remember later.
Love you, Dad.
Happy
Hellooooooo~
Mondays/Wednesdays 8:30pm - 10pm
Tuesdays 8pm - 10pmWhy?
Adopting my lovely puppy (who is now, unfortunately, a "senior citizen" says the vet... oh man, I don't want to talk about that, I know I brought it up, but no)
The crush of a lifetime (who, coincidentally, later became my boyfriend/love of my life, and today marks our 6th anniversary!)
loads and loads of drama that isn't even important anymore, but it's fun sometimes going back and reading what was sooooooo important to me back then
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